Recent St. Cloud immigrant, Renee Roxanne Abeln, has found that the the gritty side of St. Cloud is not so apparent or prevalent as she assumed it would be. “I mean, c'mon! It's a Minnesota college town!! You figure nefarious activity is going to be rife, right?” Having lived in “Salacious. St Cloud,” as Abeln calls it, for over two weeks, she has yet to find the swinging, drug-addled lifestyle she expected.
“I'm a divorced woman of 39! The only reason I would be moving here is to get down and dirty. Yet, I get here . . . and there's nothing. Oh sure, there's the partying, rampant alcoholism, and casual violence prevalent in most of the Midwest . . . but where's the wife-swappin'? Where's the S&M parties? Where's the gimps?”
When it is suggested to her that it might be her choice of social venues of the library and the local Moose Lodge, she is dismissive. “Phhhhfffttt!! Have you BEEN to your local library recently? Those places are freee-KAY and totally ILL – and I'm not talkin' inter-library loan . . .”
Still, Abeln remains upbeat. “Well, if I can't find it, I'll just have to create it. It won't be the first time.” Her first course of action? Introducing Cross-dressing Night at the Library. “I'm thinking probably Wednesday night – they don't call it hump-day for nuthin'!”
